Remain Champagne

Losin’ the crowd? See ‘em yawnin’? Can’t get them on your side? Trying to wend your way through some bit you’ve prepared but the crowd just ain’t with you, no matter how much you know that bit is funny?

If you ever find yourself in this situation as a comic, here’s what you do:

Start talking about Back To The Future.

I’m tellin’ ya, it never fails! I’ve seen it again and again. That audience perks right the hell up at the mere hint of a mention of one point twenty-one jiggawatts of power. Those kids turn right the hell back around when you start joking about Marty McFly and Biff and time travel. Makes me wish I had some Back To The Future material. I just go ahead and eat the failure when it happens to me. But if you want an easy ladder to get you out of that hole at that alternative comedy room, I have never seen a more reliable reference than Back To The Future. You will see people in the audience who are not laughing the entire night, until that one Delorean reference goes sailing out over the room, showering those present with its all-powerful comic inclusiveness. And that’s all it takes! That’s all it takes! Just one blessed, merciful mention of Enchantment Under The Sea or whatever the hell it is, and they’re yours. Those comedy nerd kids will be putty in your hands once you make a solid George McFly joke.

I’m tellin’ ya, it’s easy! Comedy show audiences between the approximate ages of twenty-two and maybe thirty all seem to brighten up when presented with Back To The Future material. It’s like throwing diamonds in front of a model/actress. They go ape-shit. It’s almost as scientific as whatever it takes to make that car go back in time so that guy can do that thing. (That’s the jiggawatt sauce, right? I’ve only seen the movie twice. What do you want from me?)

Too bad the same thing doesn’t work with Alien. I can’t tell ya how many Weyland-Yutani references have fallen just dead flat with those kids.

(Silence.)

See? Crickets.

I remain

Champagne

WHEN IN DOUBT…