Remain Champagne

14th July 2011

Post with 1 note

SUBTLE

So there’s this bathroom.  Somewhere in Vegas.  I’ve never used it, but if I did I know what I’d say right as I looked at these photos: “Subtle.  I love the subtlety.”  In fact, I’d think what they were responding to was my healthy, bright yellow stream of urine actively shooting out my urethra.  Yeah?  I mean, clearly they’re into the pee, right?  Or maybe it’s my belt buckle.  It says “Bowling” on it.

I don’t know who came up with this particular washroom campaign, but I wonder how many copies of The Game they own.

Whenever I read some sad asshole’s blog (apart from my own) about how supposedly hard it is to be a man nowadays, I always try to keep a cool head.  Whenever some uptight frequent masturbator who’s been broken up with a lot starts piping off (or typing off) about how the desire to rape is a natural male characteristic, I do a yeoman’s job of not responding to that guy at all.  Because it’s always more fun when they hang themselves with their own pouty, paranoid words and pleas for understanding.  “It’s so hard to be a guy, you guys!  There are women in the bathroom laughing at my pee-pee!”

I think these pictures are ultimately harmless.  To men.  But the wrong kind of guy (the kind of guy who—again—loves the book The Game) is gonna look at these photos and get angry.  And guess to whom he’s gonna direct his anger.  I’ll give you a hint: It’s probably not the guy (or girl) who came up with the idea to take pictures of aspiring actresses and hang them up above urinals to look down at your dick as you take a piss.

The biggest problem with the campaign (and calling it a campaign is the most complimentary thing I can say about this potty idea) is it’s just not funny.  It’s just the old scenario of women laughing at men’s dicks all over again.  I think if they’re gonna have pictures of models responding to my dick at a urinal, they should be fair and represent the other side too.  They should have pictures of models in the stalls responding to the size of my number 2.  The one holding the tape measure would be perfect.

I don’t suppose there’s a chance that the thing these women are reacting to is the brand of urinal cake being used.  Maybe?


I remain

Champagne